So apparently I’m not much of a mutant
Thursday, April 26th, 2007I mean, I can curl my tongue and turn my hands all the way around and apparently I have an aborted third nipple (but it’s pretty disappointing to witness. Really it’s just a large mole with a suspicious dimple.) But I do not have, nor am I even a carrier of Cystic Fibrosis.
If this doesn’t seem like such an amazing feat of genetics, let me tell you: it’s not. I only beat the family odds by 1-4. I was, frankly, disappointed. I mean, not only is my brother smarter than me, better looking than me, stronger than me and older than me, but he’s also more interestingly damaged than me. All I have is a slight swayback and a cavity not worth filling. I mean, don’t get me wrong–I don’t want to carry a debilitating disease or pass it on to my unborn children…but if I’m going to beat the odds, I wanted to have beaten them by, like, a million to one, not a measley four to one. All I am is slightly healthier than my sibling (his mutation means he needs an inhaler), which sets me right at…normal.
I guess I should expect that rejection from Dr. Xavier’s Academy any day now.
